warning: The following contains moments of "emo"ness. Reader discretion is advised.
Well, I'm going to try to keep this ambiguous, but its hard to be ambiguous and get my points across. (damn).
Crap. Seems like everything has gone to the shits this year. I kind of thought that this would be the time of our lives. I thought that we could end off on a good note -- or at least a better note. What happened? How did this happen? When did this start happening? Who knows. Who cares? The point is it has happened; over the past few weeks and months moreso. Should I be upset? Or would that just mean that I'm naive? Was this inevitable? Or was there some way to avoid it. But now that it has happened, should I let destruction take its course? Or should I try to mend things and patch things up where needed. Personally, I think and feel the former. However, I've been told the latter, and that person sent me on quite the guilt trip. He/She had a point though.
I dont know. I feel like sh*t for letting this go on. I feel like shit for being a
part of the problem. You know what they say, "if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem." Even literally too. I've been quite the a$$hole too. I will admit that. But I've been so hurt so many times, it just feels like its my turn to make people feel like absolute crap. Lowest of the Low. I know that makes me an a$$hole, a terrible friend, jerk etc. but I've taken enough crap already and I refuse to be stepped on. I've digressed a little. If you are lost, this paragraph explains what led up to the first paragraph.
So is this the end? Or will there be a happy ending to this story? I'll let time take its course.
dammit. dammit.